Bill Bryson “ached to be suave”. The way he behaves in public shows that he has failed in his mission. He would sometimes show the most uncivilized act. He would love, just once in his life, to rise from a dinner table without looking as if he has experienced an extremely localized seismic event or get in a car and close the door without leaving 14 inches of his coat outside or wear light-coloured trousers without discovering at the end of the day that he had at various times sat on chewing gum, ice cream, cough syrup and motor oil.
